Talking To Gaga

"You were cool and now you're not, just like that."
- Ke$ha, Grow A Pear

When I got home last night, there was a message in my Facebook inbox from Gaga asking if I wanted to have coffee with him. I have felt kind of awkward talking to him ever since I started dating Wrecking Ball, so I was surprised that he would still want to see me - since my awkwardness translated into little to no contact. I wasn't sure how Wrecking Ball would feel about it though, so I asked him if it would make him feel uncomfortable. His answer seemed a bit short: "I appreciate you asking, but I think this qualifies as 'none of my damn business.' I've got no right to meddle with your relationships." Honestly, I thought that sounded like he really did have an issue with it, but because he had specifically said he didn't want to interfere, I decided to accept Gaga's invitation. That, and I'd been hoping to talk to Gaga about replacing him when he leaves the group of dancers he is in at the bar.

I met him one hour before the bus I would need to take to campus. I had yogurt and granola and a hot chocolate, and he went on at length about his engineering thesis, what he is embarking on next, and the process he is putting in to finding his replacement at the bar. It struck me that I think Wrecking Ball and Gaga could really enjoy talking to each other, but I highly doubt Wrecking Ball would be open to that.

Gaga walked me out to the bus and Wrecking Ball was coincidentally crossing the street at the same time to catch his bus home (I assume). Gaga walked away and I was standing with Comfort when WB walked by. He didn't stop to talk or anything though, just went straight to his bus. Looking past my haze of anxiety, I realise the buses were leaving shortly and he didn't want to miss it. But at the time I interpreted it as an angry thing, and I remained stressed about it until Hey Rosetta! and I picked it apart in French class.

I was reminded today of something HR! said once about a crush she had on a coworker. She said something to the effect of not wanting to miss the opportunity for a great friendship with the guy just because she was attracted to him. I thought about that while I was sitting across from Gaga. I found that all I really wanted to do was tell him about how great Wrecking Ball is, and hear about his plans to travel, and tell him about why I want to switch to nursing. What I'm trying to say is, I want to really consider him a friend. I want to keep in touch with him when he is in Ethiopia and maybe see him once more before he leaves. Like Trinity, I am just excited about our friendship. The feelings that I had for him back in November have dissipated and now I just want to enjoy talking to him.