Fernweh

"I could float away from it all on a holiday - bon voyage - I want to get away from all I know."
- Mother Mother, Getaway

I have this itching in my skin to leave the city. When Wrecking Ball and I got back from Toronto, I felt detached from my home and wanted nothing more than to leave again. I felt this when I came back from Texas in '09 but it wasn't this bad. I thought the feeling would pass again, but it's been growing more persistent. I should probably lay some of the blame on myself for rereading 13 Little Blue Envelopes by Maureen Johnson (thanks to the Google search I did to find that author's name I found out that there is a sequel being released THIS FRIDAY awesome!) because every time I read it, it makes me want to just fly to Europe with no plan and then wander randomly for about a month.

Lately I've been wondering if I should follow this desire of mine and move away. I could move to another city in this province - there is a city barely an hour and a half away from here that offers me everything I can have here - it's the same university, I could probably even transfer to another Taco Bell. I have a lot of relatives in the area, and I've been told that cost of living is less down there too. But maybe I wouldn't be happy doing that. Maybe I only want to be gone for a little while. Maybe I want to go farther away than that. It's hard to say - I won't know until I'm gone.

Love and I are going to Cuba in August. For now, my wanderlust (thank Google again, I just found the title for this entry) (when I say "thank Google" there, it feels like I just put a website on the level of a deity. I think I'm too all-over-the-place for this tonight) will have to be content with a very short return to Toronto to retrieve Cat in two weeks.

I don't feel like tagging this entry. I have an eye appointment in the morning and I am probably going to be told that I am too blind to function and should start looking for a dog. Not really. But I am sincerely concerned about how much my eyesight has deteriorated in the last year.