Detachment

I'm feeling an intense sense of being separated from everything that is going on around me. Even when I'm sitting beside someone, it's like they're not there. The worst thing is, I'm almost sure it's not only in my head. I think I've actually been set adrift from several of my friends.

OK, so "set adrift" is kind of melodramatic. But I've been left out of some plans and I can't tell if it's conscious exclusion, an oversight, or something I don't understand.

I have a group of friends that does a lot of roleplaying together, using a few different systems of play. Recently, someone started a new series of sessions without inviting me. That's not a huge deal, especially not by itself. It did make me wonder, when I heard about it later, why I wasn't asked, but it wasn't bothering me yet.

Another friend in that same group has been setting up a new story for some time now, posting in the forums that we use to schedule and discuss our games. He held a test session a few nights ago, which was organized off-forum. I wasn't invited to this either. That would be somewhat understandable since my character isn't ready for play (read: I haven't put any thought into them whatsoever) but as it was a test of a new system, I would have liked to be there to watch, to learn about the mechanics of this new game, and to give my input later about what I thought worked or didn't work - as getting that sort of feedback is exactly why a test session would be held. It bothered me that I was left out of that, particularly because I had already heard that I was left out of the other session.

In addition to this, I keep hearing about things that happened recently but without me, and people just aren't answering my texts as often as they used to. The text thing might be in my head. But my friends are definitely doing the things they used to include me in, and not including me now. It's a bad feeling. Everything seems normal when we hang out. We're just not hanging out.