It's really hard to remember to update this blog while I'm here. Between my personal journal and my letters to Wrecking Ball, Jewel, and Hey Rosetta!, I am putting most of my experiences into words already and therefore this blog is low on my priority list of record-keeping. But I am trying to keep in mind that for some people (like my sorority sisters) this is the only view of my experience that they really have.
Yesterday after my language course (we have three-hour second language courses every Wednesday) I went and donated blood for the first time. I was so proud of myself when it was done! But very frightened beforehand. I was also frightened during the process. It was funny because about three quarters of the way through it the needle started to hurt my arm, so the nurse moved it a bit. Then it started to hurt even worse so she moved it again. They guessed I was having a mild reaction to the disinfecting agent they had put on my skin and that it was no big deal. But suddenly I was terrified and I wasn't sure I wanted to keep going. I started to cry and they offered to let me stop, but I told them I was OK and I still felt fine, the needle was just scaring me and I wanted to go until the end. I knew I would be very ashamed of myself if I stopped early. It was hard to calm myself down though. I really am quite afraid of needles, and the sensation of pain felt heavy in a way that had me half convinced it was about to rip itself out of my skin. It was awful. But again, I'm so glad I went through with it to the end. I even got a nice little pin of a drop of blood with the number one in the center, so I can openly display that I chose to do this.
Work has been going really well. I adore my time at the shelter. Every day is more or less the same: clear the breakfast table and do the breakfast dishes; wash the two bathrooms, including the showers and toilets, and sweep them; do the wordsearch and sudoku in the paper (this is my own choice, I do it during my breaks); dust the upstairs; help prepare lunch; eat lunch; clean up after lunch, which involves dishes, sweeping, and wiping the kitchen cabinets; read a novel until it's time to go. I do hope I've made a list similar to that for you before, as I want to stress that the work is almost monotonous. I want it to be clear that I have begun to take pride in my work for what it is, and enjoy it as it is, despite the apparent lameness of my schedule. I feel very appreciated for the work that I do there. I know there is too much work for one person, but that the shelter can't afford to hire another daytime staff person. Therefore, everything I do for them is highly appreciated because otherwise my "supervisor" would need to do all of my work in addition to her own, and there aren't quite enough hours in the day for that.
This week we started doing something in the Katimavik house called "Special Friends". Each person who has chosen to participate (a few people weren't interested) picked the name of another participant and at some point during the week they must do a nice thing or two for their special friend. I once gave Rose the link to this blog, so in the interest of secrecy I won't say what I did for my friend this week lest she look here and figure out who I had. For now, I'll just say that s/he loved what I did, and I will give more details after Sunday.
The end of our time here in Quebec is quickly drawing near. We have already started our debriefing activities; Roo wanted to start them early so that we can be relaxed about it. We wrote info sheets about our work placements for the next batch of volunteers and we did a reflection activity on our personal qualities. We needed to find habits to discard, continue, and develop. I chose to try to stop worrying about what others think about me and doubting myself; to continue making efforts to think and read in French (thinking in French as opposed to forming sentences in English and translating before I speak, which is a very tough habit to break!); and to develop more organisational skills (I've been way too slack about keeping my personal shelves and drawers tidy) and better financial habits (I have made great progress in this area but I still make too many impulse purchases).
Though I have known about it for a while I didn't want to say anything for fear it may not happen, but I am ready to share this news now: Wrecking Ball is going to come visit me! We have a 48 hour break (that is, no activities scheduled all weekend) next weekend and he is going to drive here to see me and then take us to Quebec City. I am more excited than I know how to describe. I think I'm more excited to see him again than I was to come here, and that is saying a lot. I'm glad I'll be house manager next week because I just can't imagine focusing at work knowing that every minute is bringing me closer to seeing him again.
I'll do my best to remember to post at least once next week about what it's really like running a household for twelve. Spoiler alert: grocery day is madness.
I'm having a great time but I miss everyone back home!
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